In the glowing dust of dawn I see you. As the city slowly wakes to taste another bitter day, in the glistening morning dew drops on my window, you smile at me. I feel a stirring, a longing to embrace you. Barefoot, I gently glide across the grass, the tiny blades of life tickle me, and catch my feet with tender mercy, their soft crisp crunch beneath me sing a song of sweet forgiveness. Your voice comes to me in the breeze. As you flow effortlessly through the branches and archways, I long to give you an answer, to acknowledge your ever growing presence- growing like the swelling sun before me. I feel your gentle nudge on my shoulder from the wind: "come speak to me." My voice starts in an unsure whisper, but soon fades to nothing because I am afraid. I am afraid if we don't have enough time, the time we do have won't matter. I'm afraid if you begin something, this day's distractions will make your impact obsolete. Have I forgotten your greatness?
What if I let you change me? What if I stepped away from this crippling fear that torments me with words like "worthless" and I let you move me to a place of boldness? Could you really use me to move mountains? is there really a chance that the life I'm living now pales in comparison to the life you have for me? Perhaps. But this faith in me gives way to fear and I feel myself slipping again.
Come to me, faithful one, because I don't have the strength to come after you. I feel so boxed in, claustrophobic, like I can't climb over these walls surrounding me. Take over my life. I need you to be as real as morning is to me. Fill up my heart with your words and overwhelm me with your beauty and strength. Help me see that fear is a lie. Help me claim the truth of boldness. Give me your spirit. Give me the faith and boldness to step out and stand up for something greater, something more. Help me believe what my eyes haven't seen yet.
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